Judgment Feels Smart. Assessment Is Wise.
Friday Reflection (No. 93)
“No reason, no blame, no argument, just understanding.”
-Thich Nhat Hanh
You’re squirming in your seat, trying to keep a neutral face, while a colleague lays out a proposal that clearly misses the mark.
You can’t believe how much they misunderstand your business and organizational reality. At best, you think “This person doesn’t connect the dots.” At worst…well, let’s not say it out loud.
Your reaction is so strong that the leader and others in the room don’t see it as a critique of the content, but rather a condemnation of the person, protecting your own turf or another attempt to showcase your ‘superior’ intellect.
As I’ve shared before, expressing judgment gives you a dopamine hit (see Antidotes to Sweet-Tipped Poison of Reactive Anger); however, it rarely moves the room.
Leadership Principle: Judgment is reactive and ego-driven. Assessment is neutral and discerning. And compassion plus curiosity is the buffer to prevent assessment from drifting into judgment.
One seemingly innocuous question from a friend revealed an important truth about the difference between judgment and assessment.
The other day, I was telling a friend about my work, specifically about how I advise leading companies to select CEOs. He paused, tilted his head, and said, “So basically… you’re a kingmaker who just sits around judging people all day.”
At first, I laughed. Then I felt defensive.
“I’m not judgmental,” I said judgmentally.
Then he laughed and eventually, so did I. Because I hate to admit it, but I can be judgmental.1
That said, when I am assessing leaders on behalf of my clients, my judgment filter gets turned off. And it’s not just due to fancy frameworks or following ghSMART’s industry-defining approach to executive assessment.
Because the reality is that judgment and assessment aren’t the same thing…not even close! Judgment comes from a place of ego. Assessment is about neutral discernment.
There are four specific tactics that allow me to stay in “assessment mode:”
Grasp the full context: I’m not evaluating someone’s worth as a human. I’m evaluating their fit for a particular role, at a particular moment, in a particular company, in a particular industry and macro-environment. This context is the frame the makes the picture make sense.
Peel back the paint. I seek to understand the story behind the canvas. Our experiences and our genetics shape who we are and how we see the world. By getting beyond the sound bites and surface level responses, curiosity guides me to form a deep understanding of how a leader has come to be the way they are today - their patterns of achievement, behavior and motivations.
Create a balanced mosaic. I’m just as focused on someone’s strengths as I am on their risks. Not in a gold-star, let’s-all-feel-good kind of way. But in a what’s-your-divine-spark-and-where-does-it-belong way. By clearly seeing both sides of the story, I can discern better insights and make more objective recommendations.
Reduce bias: I use a structured process both for data gathering and for analysis that is explicitly designed to reduce bias. Since the ego loves a snap judgment, it’s like putting a governor on my mental engine, preventing me from speeding past data that challenges an initial view I have formed.2
While I’ve honed these tactics in high-stakes C-suite evaluations, the core dilemma of “judging vs. assessing” shows up everywhere. In fact, any time you’re sizing up someone else’s ideas or even their presence, you’re at risk of letting ego steer the wheel. Therefore, judgment isn’t confined to hiring decisions. It shows up in team meetings, strategy sessions, even hallway conversations.
This is why learning to assess rather than judge, is one of the most transferable leadership skills.
Even if the distinction between “judgment” and “assessment” is clear, the application of Thich Nhat Hanh’s words sounds damn near impossible in organizational life - “No reason, no blame, no judgment, just understanding.”
What this doesn’t mean is that you serenely accept every idea. In fact, quite the contrary. Compassion and curiosity enable non-judgment AND at the same time, they unlock the discernment needed to evaluate and take appropriate action.
If you’re ambitious and care deeply about “getting it right,” then there’s a good chance you have some ego (or even an Eifel Tower size ego). That means judgment will sneak in, especially when stakes are high and you are certain you’re right. The real test will be whether you can notice when judgment emerges and choose curiosity anyway.
It’s easy to judge. It’s braver to assess with curiosity and compassion. What will you choose?
Take Action: Proven and Practical Steps
Create a short ritual before high stakes meetings or interactions where judgment rather assessment could rear its head. One that works for me is repeating the slogan “from self-righteous judgment to curious and compassionate discernment.” And there are even times, where I need to silently repeat this in the discussion. Once you do this enough, you may come to notice patterns about when your judgmental side comes out.
Slow down, note your first impression but don’t immediately act on it. Write down your first impression of an idea, particularly when the messenger is someone you’ve disagreed with in the past; however, wait to respond. Then ask yourself two questions: what would need to be true for this proposal to be the right one? and what might I be protecting by opposing this idea? Judgment thrives in speed, so this tactic compels you to engage with curiosity rather than action on your biases. You can even reference the insightful “Curiosity Curve” tool above from Jeff Wetzler to help you remain in the “zone of curiosity.”
Lead with curiosity, not conclusions. Explore the assumptions behind a recommendation, the pressures the person is under, and the stakes they saw. Compassion asks: What is it like to be in their shoes? Curiosity adds: What can I learn from how they see the world?
Reflect: Some Questions to Consider
When am I more likely to operate from a place of ego-driven judgment? What situations and which people really trigger this?
What is an upcoming meeting or discussion where you would benefit from “assessment mode” rather than “judgment mode”?
What tactics can help you to shift from ego-driven judgment to more neutral assessment?
Ok…ok…I’ve got an honors degree in judgmentalism, earned through life experience, my own wiring, and a few questionable choices. At its best, it shows up as vigilance and at its worst, as arrogance.
Daniel Kahneman’s seminal work on human biases, Thinking, Fast and Slow, should be required reading for leaders. And one of the things I love about listening to Kahneman in interviews is that he acknowledges that even though he is aware of all the different types of biases, he still frequently falls victim to them. This reinforces the need to deliberately check for biases creeping in.